Sunday, December 09, 2007

This Week's Haul: So Very Late

Once again, these reviews are ridiculously late. I have my stupid financial accounting exam tomorrow night, and then I'm free until January 7th! Sweeeeet!

Countdown Week 21

Trickster is still dead and Piper is still sad. So am I.

Countdown: Arena #1

And the Lord sayeth to Monarch "Build an arena 300 cubits by 300 cubits, and bring into the arena three of every superhero. Preferably you will choose the most ridiculous of each superhero. And make them fight to the death, for I am bored."

This, folks, is the definition of entertainment for the lowest common denominator.

I don't even know what to say about it. It's ridiculous and bad and I really, really don't understand why this "event" is happening.

Justice League of America #15

I am so close to dropping this, and that is just wrong. I'm a big JLA fan. I'm a big McDuffie fan. So why does this suck? I dunno, but it does.

It's just generally not fun or interesting. And it's full of really awkward jokes.

And also, who's drawing this thing? Sisqo?

Thong-thong-thong-thong-thong.

Canary's got dumps like a truck!

The All-New Atom #18

Ah! Now here's the best JLA-related story I've read in awhile! And the best Wonder Woman story I've read in awhile!

I actually totally adored this issue. I loved every panel. Like this one:

And this one:

And also The Atom being burned alive on a Ted Grant (snicker) Indoor Grill! And Wonder Woman licking her thumb and rubbing the blood off the Atom's head! So good.

But please don't let The Head be dead!

Avengers The Initiative Annual #1

Awesome! Not only is this everything I hope for when I pick up an annual, it's the first comic to move the Skrull storyline along in awhile. Everything interesting that is happening in the Marvel universe is happening in this series (and in the ones that Brubaker writes, of course, but those are, like, their own universe. An awesome universe).

Everyone is talking about Skrulls over in The New Avengers, but in The Initiative we're seeing some honest-to-God Skrulls. And some great back stories for all the main characters.

World War Hulk: Aftersmash

Hulk smashed. New York is a mess. Iron Man is an insufferable prick.

The most awesome thing about this comic is the Mini Marvels comic at the back.

So, so good. Marvel needs to put these into every comic. And release a book that collects them.

Please note Daredevil in the upper right corner of this panel:

I did a spit-take.

Jonah Hex #26

Man. This was messed up. I read this right before bed and I had a bad case of the jeeblies. This story is probably going to stay with me for awhile.

It was really awesome, though. And the art was fantastic!

Robin #169

Beautiful art! Lame tie-in! I mean, seriously, how many times have I heard this story?

Totally Evil Guy: "I can bring your loved ones back from the dead, all you have to do is whatever crazy thing I say!"

Noble Hero: "Really?"

Totally Evil Guy: "Yup. For reals."

Usually Very Intelligent Hero: "Well...alright then."

Other Hero(es) Present: "You probably shouldn't listen to that guy. He's evil."

Disappointing Hero: "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO! WHY SHOULD I BE ALLOWED TO LIVE WHEN MY PARENTS/SISTER/GIRLFRIEND/SIDEKICK/BROTHER/BEST FRIEND/UNCLE BEN IS DEAD?!"

Other Hero(es): "Yeah, that sucks...but the thing is, you're probably just going to die, and then the evil guy won't actually bring back your loved ones. I mean, why would he?"

Dumb Hero: "Screw you! I'm doing it!"

Comic: TO BE CONTINUED!

Really, Tim. I expected better from you.


Now, the most important thing to come out this week, of course, is the Saga of the Super Sons trade paperback. It is, hands down, the campiest thing you can own. It's just brilliantly terrible, and everyone should own it. My love/hate relationship for the Super Sons knows no bounds.

13 comments:

Skeleton Munroe said...

Ugh. The Red Rain Elseworld being part of the Multiverse really bummed me out. Such a terrible story - there are about a hundred better Batman Elseworlds alone. Hell, I'd prefer that one where the Legion of Super-Heroes reenacted the Wizard of Oz to that crap.

Hulk should always have backup smack-talkers, though.

Adam said...

Man, I haven't thought about Sisqo in years, good times.

And my exposure to Scipio leaves me a big fan of comic book Haiku humor.

Dan Sai said...

They used to run a Mini Marvels strip every month in the Bullpen Bulletin.

A few years ago they were collected in a comic format.

You can read a few of the stories over here

http://chrisgcomics.com/marvels.html

SallyP said...

Poor Trickster. And soon-to-be-poor Piper.

Aw, Arena wasn't too bad.

The JLA on the other hand...if McDuffie could get a decent artist, I think that the book would improve by leaps and bounds. All those butt-cheeks! Gah!

The sight of Ryan babbling in All-New Atom just made me giggle. He simply could not STOP!

Jonah Hex was great. You need some Heebies for your Jeeblies.

And finally, for a relatively intelligent young man, Tim is acting awfully stupidly. I hope that this is actually some sort of plan or something.

But boy, THIS week is going to be fabulous!

rachelle said...

Jonathan - not only was Red Rain Batman in Arena, he won that battle. Which means DC fans voted for him on the DC website. Booooo.

Adam - I try to think about Sisqo at least once a day.

Yeah, I thought of Scipio too. But he doesn't read Marvel, so he'll never see that comic.

Dan - Thanks for posting that link. I've been meaning to link to his site on the sidebar for awhile now.

Sallyp: I know! Booster Gold in The Killing Joke! I can't wait for that! Plus Green Lanter AND GL Corps! And the conclusion to Sinestro Corps! And Wonder Woman!

I never thought I'd be this excited about Wonder Woman.

Skeleton Munroe said...

Rar! Red Rain is White Wolf's Anne Rice's Batman! It's so angsty and annoying!

Chance said...

As usual you are right about everything.

The sad thing, Arena has the potential to be big dumb stupid fun, but instead it's only three of those four things. You're right; they picked the lamest versions of each hero, and then didn't give them anything interesting to do or say. Who knew three Batmans fighting would be so boring?

Ed benes is a terrible comic book artist. As a heterosexual male, I have no desire to see any T & A at all in my comic books. I'd rather see Black Canary, you know, facing the right way before the fight.

I would totally buy a hardcover of the mini marvels.

LurkerWithout said...

Sisqo? Man you young kids. Everyone knows that Ed Benes is the Christian name of Sir Mix-a-lot. C'mon y'all know the words!

Rich said...

Not only would I buy a Mini Marvels collection, I'd buy one for every little kid in my family.

Even if the stories are a bit over their head they'd have to love the art.

zhinxy said...

Everyone knows that Ed Benes is the Christian name of sir mix-alot

I just say: "I think Ed's from Brazil, y'know? Home of the Brazillian?" That said, I continue to be a fan of his... A big fan. God help me...

zhinxy said...

I know Arena is stupid, but we need things like this once in a while... "You vote, they fight." Then they have a crisis?

And am I the only one who likes Red Rain Batman? My brother thinks he's cool!

Anonymous said...

I love Ed Benes art. I loves me the T & A=). Hmm, i didn't vote for red rain batman, but i forgot who i did vote for. I do remember i voted for Bat-Lantern though. Hey Rachelle, did you hear about the new super sons TPB? Pfft, of course you did, i can't waut for those scans and comentary.

Unknown said...

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