Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Rating the Super Hunks #7: Midnighter

I'm back and ready to rate another super hunk. I'm a little sleepy today, but nothing wakes me up like examining the finer points of attractive super heroes. This week we turn the spotlight on...

Midnighter


Costume/Appearance: Midnighter's costume is dope. It's one of my very favourites. All black with a stylish trench coat, awesome boots, and a badass mask. Plus, the minimalist logo is very cool. The costume is full of attractive and cool details, too, like spiked knuckles on the gloves, buckled-on gauntlets on his sleeves, and a big ol' belt buckle.

You don't get to see Midnighter with the mask off very often. I thought that when they finally revealed his face for the first time, he'd be all scarred and stuff, because that's usually the way with characters that never take their masks off. Imagine how pleased I was to learn that he's quite the hottie under the mask, with rugged features and sandy hair.

Hot costume. Hot guy.

10/10

Alter-Ego: Who knows? He doesn't use one, and even he doesn't know much about his past. Midnighter is the only name he goes by, and, really, can you blame him? I would also insist that people call me that all the time.

Personality-wise, Midnighter is an intense guy. He's grouchy, but he's not usually brooding like, say, Batman. He has a quick, sardonic wit that always cracks me up.

Basically Midnighter is scary as hell, but he's still a loving and devoted husband and father.

He's very macho and very badass, but sometimes he just needs a little loving. On that note, he's not only one of the few openly homosexual super heroes, he is also generally one of the most openly sexual heroes. He has a sex life, and we know it. The fact that his relationship is with one of his teammates makes it all the hotter. In battle he's always looking at Apollo like he can't wait to get him home.

9/10

Day Job:
Ass-kicking member of The Authority, devoting himself to the creation of a better world. By killing lots and lots of assholes.


10/10

Sexiness of Powers: Midnighter is the ultimate killing machine. Not only does he have super-strength, durability, and the ability to heal himself, but he also can calculate over a million possible outcomes for every situation in seconds. Plus, he loves using his powers, which is fun.

His powers are definitely sexy. Just look at how Apollo looks at him after a battle.

9/10

Cons:
Well, he's not interested in chicks, which ruins my chances, but he and Apollo are so hot together that I certainly can't complain. Midnighter's flaws lie in the fact that he's stubborn, and probably more than a little psychotic. He's very detached, and tends to keep his troubles to himself, which never leads to anything good. He also has a giant chip on his shoulder, and tends to mouth off when it isn't necessary. Apollo puts up with a lot of crap. Plus, Midnighter's a stone-cold killer, which may bother some people. I guess I'll take off a couple points for that.

- 2


Final Score: 36/40

I knew this guy would score high, because I am totally in love with him. Especially since his solo series rocks the house. Apollo is pretty sexy too. We'll have to see how he ranks, someday.

21 comments:

Theresa said...

Okay, I was loving this post, and was just about to add this title to my pull list...but did you have to post that last panel. :shudder: They look awful, and the whole Authority run around this issue was aesthetically the reason I could never get into that book. No character that looked good at any point should be allowed to look that bad....

I'm sorry if that's a girl comment to make (to talk about the look of the characters) but...I'm a girl. LOL

rachelle said...

Oh yeah. Frank Quitely drew them all big and blobby. Don't get me wrong, I love Quitely, but those were some unattractive renditions of A&M. But he hasn't done any Authority-related art for years, so you're in the clear.

Chris Sims said...

As much as I love Quitely on All-Star Superman and We3, I still can't go back and read JLA: Earth 2 without thinking everyone looks bloated, lumpy, and possessed of horrible hair.

Theresa said...

Yes, well, I started at the beginning of the Authority run and tried to read straight through, but I got to the part where everyone started to look *completely* different and wack, and I just...gave up. Guess I could revisit it all at this point...

Michael Jones said...

Please enlighten me. Where is it on the human body that could possibly be worse than having your genitals electrocuted? Your ears? I've never heard of the character before your blog (I am SO out of the comix scene!) You've peaked my interest.

Tom the Bomb said...

Part of the appeal of this feature is getting one woman's perspective on male characters. For example, as a guy, I would have assumed that the Midnighter's homicidal psychotic-ness would have brought his score down much more.

Read and learn, I guess.

Anonymous said...

What is it about gay men that women find so fascinating? I wish I was gay -- I could get chicks by the carload.

Adam said...

Wow. First off I love reading your posts and I think my friend Brian has a crush on you.
But anyway...
I've decided I can't hold back my words any longer and had to comment. I love this segment and I'm thrilled that Midnighter did so well. I wouldn't have even thought to rate him. I guess that's why I'm not doing it. And I'm guessing when Midnighter is electrocuting you - anywhere would hurt really bad and I definitely don't look forward to it. Oh and I just started reading Midnighter and the Authority so this post was the first time I saw him without his mask and who knew he was so gentleman looking.

Adam said...

...well at least when he's not drunk looking.

SallyP said...

I don't know too much about Midnighter, but he does have a very attractive and practical costume.

I find it interesting that he apparently doesn't have an alter ego, and insists on being called "Midnighter" all the time. I can only assume that his given name is something he's embarrased about...like Cuthbert or Aloysius or something.

Anonymous said...

'love you to bits'!! That is adorable. Even if they look blobbular.
I love that you rated Midnighter. My score's about the same.

Jess Nukem said...

I'll look forward to the day when you rate a X-Man. Just don't do Cyclops, Angel, Wolverine, Colossus, Gambit..... maybe you shouldn't do a X-Man, they're all douches.

But I'd love to see you rate Savage Dragon or even Archie..... :p

John Foley said...

Rate Colossus! He's the man.


[on a side note: maybe it hurts more to have electrodes up your butt or clamped to your eyelids]

Jess Nukem said...

Not Colossus, he fell in love with Kitty who was only fourteen at the time and cheated on her with some alien on some faraway planet. Pretty f*cking terrible if you ask me. :p

rachelle said...

I can't tell you how much I'm enjoying listening to you guys debate which heroes deserve super hunk status.

I am planning on rating some X-Men soon. Probably all of the ones mentioned, even Gambit (for old time's sake).

And, anonymous, it's not so much gay men that I find fascinating. It's gay men who also happen to be the world's most perfect killing machine.

Anonymous said...

Do Archie. That was a great suggestion. I've never understood the appeal. He has red hair and girls fighting over him and a Saturday morning cartoon show of poor production quality!

Haerandir said...

Sallyp,

The whole "no-alter-ego" thing is a result of his origin. Both Apollo & the Midnighter are products of one of Henry Bendix's clandestine black-ops super-teams from when he was running Stormwatch and had his hand in basically every super-secret covert super-everything, everywhere, all the time.

In any case, neither of them HAS any identity other than their super-hero ID any more. I haven't been keeping up with the Wildstorms universe, so I'm not fully clear on whether their memories were erased, or just their records. But they make it a point of emphasis that they have no past.

plok said...

If you do Archie, you might as well follow it up with Conan for contrast.

Viagra said...

Am kind of a classic comic book reader so I have to confess that this one is new for me, but what really amazed me is the fact he's openly Gay, it takes a lot of courage to make a Super Hero to be all bad-ass and Gay.

xlpharmacy said...

I love Catman. He was the bad guy in my very first Batman comic, Detective #509, in 1981, drawn by the late, great Don Newton. Back then he had a magic cape that gave him nine lives, and that was pretty much his gimmick. I guess that’s long gone. He was pretty much of a sad sack even back then.

I suppose I should give Secret Six a shot, since I keep hearing good things about it and I loved both Suicide Squad and the previous versions of the Secret Six. I had no idea that there was still a “Mockingbird” running the group. That makes me want to read it more. I’m pretty old school, though, and I fear that it will be too bleak and/or gruesome for me.

Eddy F said...

I for one am a gay comic book dweeb and I just found out about the Midnighter a couple of months before. Im super glad someone took the step to make a sexually/openly gay superhero. To ME he is a combination of my fav. superheroes; Batman, Wolverine, and Deadpool.... But gay lol

If they EVER make a movie I believe they should cast the now openly gay Zachary Quinto (Sylar of HEROES/ Mr. Spock in the new Star Trek). As we saw with his role as Sylar, he can be dark and psychotic